From the moment you find out your pregnant until you die, there's a constant companion to your being a Mom: Fear.
As your baby grows to be a toddler exploring the world, there are tiny objects they may swallow, there are shower gels they may try and drink, there may be power outlets to play with. The toddler may wander off within split seconds you don't pay attention at the supermarket.
The list goes on and on, and fears change by each year as your kid gets older.
Considering Colin's playing hockey I have to brace myself for injuries like concussions, lost teeth, fractured bones and the likes.
It's not fun to watch your baby not getting up after getting an unfair elbow check.
Also (cyber) bullying is on my mind.
We talk about peer pressure, doing the right things, the danger of drugs quite often.
Let me go back in time and share a story about myself as a kid:
I grew up along railroad tracks. Back then there were no controlled level crossings, no flashing lights or lowering gates, you had to look left and right yourself before crossing the tracks.
When I was five years old, one of my (grown up) neighbors obviously did not do a great job paying attention, and he got caught and killed by a train.
My Mom was shocked when we were out and about, and upon approaching the railroad crossing I looked down, folded my hands, murmured something and then (without looking) crossed the tracks. "WTF are you doing?" she asked. "Mrs E told be to pray for her husband every time I came here." I explained.
Wow.
So obviously - even though this particular railroad crossing was made safe a few years later - I told my son to be extra careful here and on the street for that matter. My parents still live in their house, so every Tuesday Colin has been walking there from Kindergarten and later from school.
Other things I try to impress upon him are not to accept candy or rides from strangers and not to run after soccer balls flying away to the street. "Balls can be replaced - you can't."
I don't know whether he actually remembered or is just responsible enough now that he is ten years old.
Either way the other day at daycare it happened. They were on the playground playing, and somebody kicked the ball high over the fence, and it landed on the street. The kids initially did run after it but saw the bus approaching and stopped.
The ball turned out flat as a pancake.
Coincidence has it that I participated in a photo competition and won a voucher from the supermarket. So what I plan on doing with that money is to purchase a new soccer ball for our daycare. Because balls can - and will be - replaced.
What are some of your fears as a Mom? How have they changed as your kids are growing older? Is it true what they say? Little kids, little worries - big kids, big worries?
- Something might go wrong within the first months of pregnancy and you miscarry.
- Actually something might go wrong within the remaining months of pregnancy and you miscarry.
- There might be complications during labor. Or you give birth to a stillborn.
- There might be something wrong with your baby that you detect during pregnancy or after giving birth.
- What if you can't do this Mom job? Baby is crying and you don't know what to do?
- Is (s)he still breathing? What if I fall asleep myself and the baby is in distress?
As your baby grows to be a toddler exploring the world, there are tiny objects they may swallow, there are shower gels they may try and drink, there may be power outlets to play with. The toddler may wander off within split seconds you don't pay attention at the supermarket.
The list goes on and on, and fears change by each year as your kid gets older.
Considering Colin's playing hockey I have to brace myself for injuries like concussions, lost teeth, fractured bones and the likes.
It's not fun to watch your baby not getting up after getting an unfair elbow check.
Also (cyber) bullying is on my mind.
We talk about peer pressure, doing the right things, the danger of drugs quite often.
Let me go back in time and share a story about myself as a kid:
I grew up along railroad tracks. Back then there were no controlled level crossings, no flashing lights or lowering gates, you had to look left and right yourself before crossing the tracks.
When I was five years old, one of my (grown up) neighbors obviously did not do a great job paying attention, and he got caught and killed by a train.
My Mom was shocked when we were out and about, and upon approaching the railroad crossing I looked down, folded my hands, murmured something and then (without looking) crossed the tracks. "WTF are you doing?" she asked. "Mrs E told be to pray for her husband every time I came here." I explained.
Wow.
So obviously - even though this particular railroad crossing was made safe a few years later - I told my son to be extra careful here and on the street for that matter. My parents still live in their house, so every Tuesday Colin has been walking there from Kindergarten and later from school.
Other things I try to impress upon him are not to accept candy or rides from strangers and not to run after soccer balls flying away to the street. "Balls can be replaced - you can't."
I don't know whether he actually remembered or is just responsible enough now that he is ten years old.
Either way the other day at daycare it happened. They were on the playground playing, and somebody kicked the ball high over the fence, and it landed on the street. The kids initially did run after it but saw the bus approaching and stopped.
The ball turned out flat as a pancake.
Coincidence has it that I participated in a photo competition and won a voucher from the supermarket. So what I plan on doing with that money is to purchase a new soccer ball for our daycare. Because balls can - and will be - replaced.
What are some of your fears as a Mom? How have they changed as your kids are growing older? Is it true what they say? Little kids, little worries - big kids, big worries?
The fears definitely change as they get older, but not necessarily get bigger, they are just different. There are more ups and downs, like an emotional roller coaster. One moment they need you, the next they hate you. They want to be independent, which is part of growing up. And yes, we still need to be vigilant, but we also need to let go. We can no longer control everything around them. We need to trust more. They need to make mistakes, and so do we as parents.
ReplyDeleteOur babies cause us worry from the time they are growing inside us to the day we or them die, hopefully it is we not them. All my babies are mums themselves now, so I worry a lot about my grandbabies.
ReplyDeleteI don't think the fears will ever go away. My Barbarians are a smidge older than Colin and I still worry about them. My Mum still worries about me and my brothers even though we left home while still teenagers. I think it goes with the job description.
ReplyDeleteI'm probably one of the most scared mums out there. I wish I was less afraid as I feel I'm hindering their sense of adventure. I would like my girls to be more bold and confident than I am
ReplyDelete