Will do Math for Candy

Photo by Carl Raw on Unsplash

I was sick in bed for a total of four days this week. As I got a little better I spent some quality time - or so I thought - on Social Media. One post in the Swiss Mommy group caught my attention. Good thing I brought popcorn, too.

The original person told her story:

Half an hour ago the Mom of one of my son's classmates called me. I was making lunch, and the kids just got home, so I couldn't talk much. 

She told me the first graders were doing mental math up to 20. The students had to write their name and the result on a piece of paper and go see the teacher at her desk.

She gave a piece of candy to every kid whose result was correct. The others got nothing.

Obviously my son was upset and cried, so another kid gave him their candy. 

The other Mom claimed she was horrified and just wanted to give me a heads-up so I could call the teacher later.

Wow. Why would she even post this? Is she bored? Is there a question? What kind of advice does she want, if any? 

The commenting population didn't care. They had an opinion, and they needed to dump it:

• Unacceptable. If the teacher wants to do a reward system, she should include everyone. Two pieces of candy for the correct result, one candy for everyone else.
• My son would have cried many times if he were in that class. Unfair or not, I don't think you should call the teacher.
• So there was no time limit? Like "only the first one who brings the correct result gets the candy"? In that case it's OK. They all had the same chance.
• My son is dyslexic, so even if he works super hard, he'll never get candy, this is why I personally would not be thrilled, but I wouldn't call the teacher either.
• The caller is right!!! Reward systems like this one foster competitiveness instead of teamwork. Plus in general, when raising kids, you should not work with incentives. Kids learn to work hard only if they get something in return. Also, those who had the wrong result probably had to work harder but didn't get rewarded for their efforts? My partner is doing some further education, and in their psychology class they are discouraging reward systems.
• I agree. Everybody should have gotten candy.
• What? First graders do math up to 20 already? 
• Guys, we send our kids to public school, we have to accept the methods that are being applied there.
• The teacher should discuss reward systems with us parents beforehand. I don't want my kids to be influenced improperly.
• OMG, today's "problem"! Boy, am I glad my kids are older. Back in my days nobody would have called another parent to rant about something like this!
• Exactly! Back in my time it was normal that rewards were only for special achievements. Today the kids are getting stuff at any given time, everything is being analyzed, questioned and assessed. Life isn't fair, some people's journey is tougher than other people's. What's important is how you handle your challenges. We should give our kids means to do so.
• How unfair is this? The ones who suck at math were named and shamed in front of the entire class? I would give that teacher an earful if it was my son!
• My son had this in second grade. It was a granola bar, though. He got super motivated to work hard and do well so he would get the reward. I was pretty thrilled! There are always kids who take it hard, but they need to learn that life is no picnic.
• Why isn't the other Mom calling the teacher if she's so unhappy?
• Instead of handing out candy, the teacher should take the time to explain the assignment once again, so the students who had it wrong have a chance to learn.

I was intrigued about the diversity of people / answers. Also I was surprised about the additional "facts" they made up. The original person didn't say anything about shaming the kids or that the teacher did not explain it enough.

I was glad nobody hijacked the thread to divert it towards a discussion about school in general, homework or better yet, vaccination ;-)))

Usually I don't participate in discussions like these. You can't win, people have different opinions. Plus I was viewing this situation knowing my own kid does well in school. I still thought I had a point or three to make, though, so I went ahead:

• Our school keeps advising us to give the kids healthy snacks, so I'd frown upon the candy, but hey, maybe she didn't have enough trick or treaters and wanted to get rid of it?*
• Kids who are successful in sports get applause, medals and trophies all the time. Why should somebody who's great at math not get some recognition for a change?
• I love, love, love that the other kid volunteered to give their candy to the boy who was sad. Isn't this what school and life should really teach our kids? Compassion and kindness?

 *Fully knowing that many people in this group hate Halloween and might start a rant about the ridiculousness of following every stupid American custom... 

I told Colin about it and read some of the comments I thought were ridiculous to him. 

He chuckled and said "we do this, too, sometimes. Our teacher has these chewing gums -  I always give them away, they taste yucky."

Hahahaha!

So what's your opinion? Does a little competition spoil kids' intrinsic motivation?