Ultimate Blog Challenge - Headlines

Photo by Lynda Hinton on Unsplash

Welcome back to the Ultimate Blog Challenge. Today's prompt comes with the following instructions:

Grab a magazine from your coffee table.

Now take a look at the cover. Write down the headlines as they appear. Chances are they'll look something like this:

The ..... secrets to .....

Learn how to ..... today

..... tips to .....

Once you've written down the headlines, replace the keywords with your own. Fill in the blanks. 

How fun is this?

With media, it's always about ratings, readership and number of clicks. Some newspapers and authors are known to stretch the facts to the max. 

And in rare cases you get caught writing and printing ahead. Like Betty White's 100th birthday celebration. 

So what does my magazine say?

Santa Claus Holiday timeline: 

Did he break toys after burning cookies?

We all have been there: 

Deadlines were announced well in advance. And yet you're running late, messing up your project. In the end you hand in whatever you were able to throw together at the last minute.

Duh, I can tell you exactly how many days till Christmas 2022. Well, I can't but this online countdown can. Anyway, it's not that December comes by surprise. Not to anyone. Especially not to old Saint Nick.

Still, his time management hasn't improved over the years. He likes to procrastinate. "There's still enough time" he said after Halloween. "I need to clear my workshop first. So much clutter everywhere. Oh, and so much candy to eat. Look, a squirrel!"

Mrs Claus rolled her eyes. 

She produced her iPhone and opened her e-mail app.

You have 384,725 new messages she read.

Mostly kids' wish lists, a few offers to invest in crypto currencies, FAO Schwarz' kick-back, credit note, a couple notes from DHL claiming you did not pay for custom fees, Elf on the Shelf reports on how the kids are behaving and of course your Allrecipes notifications: sugar cookies, gingerbread men, PB blossoms,...

Photo by Pavel Danilyuk from Pexels

Santa perked up his ears.

"Black and white cookies, too? They're my personal favorite. Even though chocolate balls with candy cane sprinkles are delicious as well, or how about..."

Honey, focus. You really need to get organized. Get some gifts ready and feed the reindeer, will you please.

Santa nodded. "So what are the children asking for anyway?"

Anything Pokémon and Paw Patrol, Beyblade battle stadiums, Purrbles, and of course the usual: Nintendo, PlayStation, Barbie, LEGO, Nerf Guns...

"I'm on it - let me just check the refrigerator. Do we have ingredients to make black and white cookies, I think I can work much better with a little treat to keep me happy! I have been feeling a little burnt out lately."

Speaking of burnt...

What's that smell?

And what's Santa doing in the vineyard - shouldn't he be in his workshop?

In case you're wondering. The original timeline was:

Djokovic Covid timeline: Did he break rules after testing positive?

Personally I think the entire story is more than fishy, and he shouldn't have been granted an exemption in the first place. Rules are for everyone, even if you're a famous tennis star.

What's your take? Let me know.